Nightmares < Dreams < Reality (get it?)

I woke up from nightmares this morning around 5 a.m. I was trying to open my eyes and I couldn't. In my dream, I was losing my vision. I went to the bathroom and pulled my eyes open and they were beet red and looked really bad. I was at a family reunion in some house, surrounded by my cousins and other family. I overheard them bad mouthing me and I decided to give them a piece (or two) of my mind. But my eyes wouldn't open. They thought that since I couldn't see, that I was also deaf. Haha  I was ripping into people. I was very hurt and felt betrayed. I hate having dreams that people I love have turned on me. I seem to dream that a lot. This was actually one of the better dreams that I have had. They have been much worse. I have dreamed that family members were trying to kill me. I know this means nothing. I've always had wacked out dreams. I don't mind nightmares any more because when I wake up from them, I see my sweetheart laying next to me and just beam from the inside. It's like I have this little flicker of a flame going all the time, but when I see his face, it spreads through my whole body like a forest fire. Smokey the Bear would be on my heels every second of the day if he only knew.

Before I gave my life to God and my heart to Chadd, I would wake up from bad dreams and my life wasn't much better. I was miserable in almost every aspect of my life. Some times, my whole day would be affected by a bad dream. Some days, I read too much into them and it just made me paranoid. Having good dreams wasn't much better because I would wake up and feel depressed with my life since my dreams were so much sweeter. Now, I wake up from nightmares and I'm happy. I wake up from good dreams and I'm happy. It is all so different and I give all glory to God.  Because of God, I found my husband. And because of my husband, I found true love, the only thing I have ever wanted. 

BLAH!!! GROSS! Whatever, get over it. If you are sickened by this, it's because you are either A. an atheist, in which case, I am praying for you- not just because you need it but I know it pisses you off.  ;)

or B. You are bitter or jealous, in which case- GET over it and start having some faith in God because your life will start improving once you start believing.

Enough about that. This morning, I decided I wanted pancakes. Chadd took me to IHOP and we indulged in some very good breakfast food. I am sorry to admit that I haven't reached the point where I am genuinely enjoying my food yet, but I can say that I at least appreciate it. I can also say that I am so thankful I ate a whole stack of pancakes without gagging but once. Haha I made it to the very last two bites and I started shivering. Chadd laughed- of course- WHO wouldn't?  ha!

Then, we went to finish up our Christmas shopping and I was in the best mood. This is the best I have felt in a very long time. I haven't felt sick all day and I actually had enough energy to walk around the mall with my husband and I had enough patience to not beat anyone up for bumping into me. Yes, my temper has been kinda hot lately. I did, however yell at a guy in the parking lot for speeding through. There were little ones running all around. 

OOoooh!!! While we were shopping, Chadd spotted this beautiful coat that I have been wanting. Crazy, thing is, it was a coat I saw online but never even told him about and HE saw it and pointed it out. I guess he really knows my taste. :)   For years, I have been telling myself every winter that I will buy myself a nice winter coat and I never do. Chadd insisted on buying this beautiful coat for me for Christmas. He took a picture of me trying it on...

I managed to fold two loads of laundry and organize our closets. I am so happy I am feeling more normal today. I realize I have taken SO many thing for granted and I am going to try to make more of an effort to  be more thorough when I am thanking God for my blessings. Those little things are big things to some people. Those little things are usually the things we overlook that contribute most to our overall well-being and happiness.

I am going to turn on some Otis Redding and finish cleaning. I hope everyone has an awesome day.Count your blessings... I love you <3